UCC Mainstream Online


How to make it last

Abby Bischoff, Flickr

Although presents are a large part of showing affection and love to that “special someone”, a couple of our own UCC students and faculty believe that having a good relationship goes deeper than gifts and surprises.

Laura Vellines, a current UCC student, said that communication is one of the more significant sentiments that makes a relationship last. “Being able to talk with and understand the other person is what makes a relationship stand the test of time,” Vellines said.

“Good listening is central to a successful relationship,” Paula Usrey, associate communications professor, said. “Different situations in relationships call for different types of listening. Sometimes a partner needs to feel supported and just needs someone to listen in a supportive manner (no advice wanted or needed). Other times a partner may need to be understood so that the other person really “gets” what is important to them and who they are. Taking time to really listen to another person is one of the greatest acts of caring we can offer.”

Others feel that moral values are the key to successful relationships.

“I think honesty and trust are important in any healthy relationship,” Haley Stammen, a current UCC English major, said.

Being in a relationship is no easy task. “A relationship is a big commitment; you have to think about someone else’s needs above your own,” Stammen said. Leilani Poe, a current UCC student said, “Let go of selfishness and allow selflessness to take over.”

And for those that aren’t in a romantic relationship, Leder offers more advice, “Take the time to let your special someone know how much they mean to you. If you are not currently in a romantic relationship, take the time to focus on your other close relations.”

Many people have a hard time divulging about their personal lives, but some students that wanted to remain anonymous had answered questions about what makes a relationship last, “being able to adapt to changes in life together, as soon as you think you got it figured out it changes.”

What advice they would give younger relationships, “listen to one another, don’t always assume you know how your partner feels and thinks.”

And what they thought was hard about being in a relationship, “distance, and relationships in general are hard because you have to constantly be helping that person, but love is worth it.”